TMI? Too Much Information. It's just easier to say "TMI." I used to say "don't go there," but that's lame.

I'm in line for the security checkpoint at Pittsburgh International Airport. There is a woman in front of me with two early-elementary-school-age children...old enough to not wear diapers and to carry their own bags, but young enough that they still need specific instructions. The woman looks more than slightly frazzled. "Put your bag up here, honey. We don't need that bin, please put it back over there. Take your shoes off and put them with Mommy's. No, don't take your socks off, just your shoes. Leave your socks on!!"

With this last line, she looks back at me and smiles apologetically. I smile back, because I assume she feels guilty for holding up the line, but I'm not in any great hurry and I want to reassure her that I'm not getting impatient. I also nod knowingly, as if to say, "Kids can be this way sometimes!" Of course, I have no children, only cats, but they would certainly be terrors if I ever took them to the airport.

Don't assume things, Sarah. She wants to apologize for something other than their lack of speed:

"He's got toe fungus, you know."

I'm not sure what my face looked like after that, but it couldn't have been pretty. Was that necessary? Keeping your socks on is standard protocol for airport security screenings, so did I really need an explanation for why you were so adamant that your son's socks remained on his crusty little toes? I think not. Shudder.

One more reason I love going to the airport.